Sexual Assault/Rape

This is a very touchy subject for everyone. People don't realize that this unfortunately happens more often than we think and to people that we know and are friends with. I have a couple of friends that have been a victim of this and I have been a victim as well. It is very damaging to someone not only physically but mentally and emotionally. If you have a scar somewhere on your body look at it...Just like a scar on your body this is a scar that victims have. In our slides it says that 75% of rapes are committed by people that they know. How scary is that!? Rape should not ever be something that is common in the United States but it is and we need to do something about it. Unfortunately some victims do not report it and if they do they are told that the process will be grueling and they will make you out to be the bad person. How screwed up is that in this world! That infuriates me! I know the people I know who have suffered from this have had relationship problems and depression problems. Hopefully someday this won't be a common thing we have to deal with. For those of you that this happened to a family member or friend, just love them, support them and encourage them.

Rehab

Okay so this year there have been a few celebrities that have gone to rehab for drugs, alcohol, and whatever else reason there is. But I noticed that the ones that publicized and given alot of newstime are women. Look at Eva Mendes, Britney Spears, Tara Reid, Lindsay Lohan, Kirsten Dunst just to name a few. They are all women. You rarely hear about men going to rehab, why is it that? Why is it when women act out of their norm and not like the perfect lady it gets so much newstime...? It gets the front page of magazines or posted all over gossip sites and even television. I remember watching CNN one day and then all of sudden breaking news--Britney Spears Checks Into Rehab. It's ridiculous and unnecessary.

Gender bias on television shows

So for my project, i decided to take a closer look at the gender stereotypes that are portrayed on television. After i had done this, now all of the shows that i'm watching have gender sterotypes almost in every episode! My favorite one, which is very old school, but "I love Lucy". This is so stereotyped that the women stay and home and clean, cook, take care of the kids. Then for the men they are looked at as the breadwinners and rarely do naything around the house such as cooking or cleaning. I just found it so amazing that this show made gender stereotypes stand out so much.

In some of the shows today, more roles are being switched where men are doing the stay at home gig and women are out working. But it's still not really seen as muuch, and if it is.. it's just looked at as kind of weird!

=)

Too Skinny

The media is everywhere we look. I just can't get over how it portrays men and women. Everytime I look in a magazine I see it all the time. The men in the advertisements have the cutest body and they are perfect from head to toe. The women are the same they can practically fit into childrens clothes they are so skinny and their hair, makeup, clothes everything is perfect. They are also half naked. I understand sex sells but does it have to be at this level. It affects the audience in different ways. Yes it could make you buy the product they are endorsing but it also has negative affects on people. At times after I see ad after ad after ad with these perfect bodies internally I think oh well if only I had abs like her or perfect hair like her it would make me happier. It gets people down. For me it gets me when summer rolls around I have put up pictures of celebs I like on my fridge or mirror and I make that my goal to get skinny like them. Then I realize what Im doing and hit myself in the head because who wants to live like that, wanting the perfect body. That doesn't bring you happiness. Being happy with yourself makes you a happy person. I wish society and the media would change this but realistically its never going away.

Rescue

After seeing and hearing most of our projects last week I couldn't help but think that we are never going to escape it. Going back to children books where the female is always looking and needing to be rescued by the male. I was thinking of all the childrens movies that I used to watch like Cinderella, Snow White, Sleeping Beauty, the Little Mermaid they all have the male rescuing the female. What does that teach us? That women can't save themselves, that we need a male to come rescue us...In the past I have thought about this and my friends and I refer to it at times saying "All I need or want is prince charming to come sweep me off on his white horse and rescue me." That doesn't do any good. Why do have that mentality? It stems back to these movies and books and being told that when we were little. It's a nice thought but women don't always need a man to rescue them, we need to rescue eachother.

Gender bias on the internet

So earlier today, i was playing on the internet and came across one of those annoying adds. It was asking what type of job you want and right next to it had these little icons of characters playing those job roles. I realized that next the male dominated icons, was obviously a little male character. Like attourney, doctor, engineer, and cop. And next to the female gendered characters the jobs were nurse, assistant, and teacher. I just found it kind of funny that even on these little icons for jobs, it was being gender bias!

challenging gender role and categories

waht do you think about it?

The Ugly Truth

So, I found this movie trailer coming up in April, calls "The Ugly Truth." It seems like there is tons of women and men's gender differences.  The first thing got my attention was that the woman and man icon things.  Woman figure has the heart on the head but man figure has on the penis.  I thought it's very stereotypical.  And in the trailer, she was excited about the man she met who is a surgeon.  This is also showing that women supposed to get married with high salary or high status guys.  I am not trying to blame this movie or anything like that, I actually like this like of movie, yes.  I just thought it is interesting.  

Movies

I was forced to watch the new Angelina Jolie movie "wanted" last night and it made me realize that if a women is the leading action person in the movie that they are always beautiful and sexy. I started to think about it and realized that there isn't a single movie that if the lead action hero is women and she isn't viewed as a sex symbol. I also realized the same for men. Most of the time if the lead action hero is a man then he is also viewed as a sex symbol. The question I present to the blog is can an action hero be an effective action hero without being sexy?

Gender Based Insurance rates

I linked an article on the title "Gender Based Insurance rates." This is the news article obviously about Insurance rates based on gender.  Women pay more than men.  I still do not understand why women need to pay more than men.  If I go with traditional view of men and women, men are the one who work outside and higher risk of danger and women take care themselves better than men.  Even if I don't think traditionally, science proves that men have higher risk of getting heart attack than women do.  I do not know that how they calculate, but I believe it there should not be some difference BASED ON gender.

American society does focus a great deal on the perfect body, but think about the face as well. I mean there's so much airbrushing done on these celebrities and models. They also use tons of make-up, even on men. Perfect skin and hair also plays a huge role on how Americans define beauty. Also think about how much money these products cost. It is such an effective advertising strategy. Wear this 20 dollar bottle foundation and you'll look like this movie star.
I think at least some of them are starting to make progress but this perception has been going on for decades so changing it will probably take twice as long

So I was just thinking how interesting it was today in class that majority of people when presenting looked at the way that women are portrayed in the media and how overwhelming it has become that women are to be only sex objects that can not think on their own or hold any short of responsible job. With that said looking at all the magazine ad, tv shows, and music videos I know that I still watch them and wonder if society is so concerned with creating a certain image that we must conform to what do you think would happen if all of the different media outlets were taken away? Would our society still so harshly judge physical beauty and why is it in the U.S. dominatly we focus so much on the body and nothing else?

Curious..

So I was talking to one of my guy friends the other night at the bar. We were talking about girls who dress up or don't for classes. He said, "You know what guys think of girls who dont dress up right? That they are taken."
I find it really hard to believe that people even notice or think about that while going to class.
I wonder if that's true. I don't see the point honestly because I'm not really thinking about picking up a date while I'm having a hard enough time satying awake to pay attention to the information.
'

McDonalds Commerical( Stereotypes)

stereotypes at its best, yet not offensive

Topless photo of 14-year-old Grand Blanc girl sparks sexual discrimination debate

GRAND BLANC, Michigan -- That topless photo of a Grand Blanc teen sure did stir up a heck of a lot of debate.

On whether girls have the same right as guys to go topless.

If cellphones should be allowed in school.

And why people are so darn interested in this story.

A 14-year-old girl took a topless photo of herself on her cellphone. The picture spread around Grand Blanc High School, and seven students were suspended -- including the girl -- for having the photo on their phones at school.

An attorney for the parents argued in part that the discipline amounted to sex discrimination because photos of bare-chested males are fine, photos of bare-chested females should also be fine.

A firestorm ensued. More than 100 people posted comments on the Journal's Web site, mlive.com. Most think the parents don't have a case against the school.

Male prisoners gain right to cosmetics

The Federal Constitutional Court said the plaintiff was right in challenging a prison policy which allowed only female inmates to spend 25 euros (£21) of their own money on cosmetic and skin care products each month.

"Although the interest in cosmetics may be more widespread or frequently stronger among women than among men, it is not a biologically determined interest among women," the court ruled.

"Members of one sex cannot be denied their wellness choices simply because they are more typically found among the opposite sex."

It said the current practice of only allowing women to purchase beauty products amounted to a violation of the protection against sex discrimination under Germany's Basic Law.

New VIC laws allow gays to 'commission' surrogate children

Gay men will be able to commission a baby via a surrogate mother under new Victorian laws that have angered the Christian lobby.

The landmark laws, passed in State Parliament late on Thursday, legalise surrogacy and give lesbians and single women access to fertility treatment, including IVF.

The Australian Christian Lobby has denounced the legislation as “social engineering” and says it will enable gay men to “order” a surrogate baby on demand.

“It steps outside the natural family, two men can’t (physically) have a baby,” lobby spokesman Rob Ward said.

“The wishes of homosexuals to have children should not be placed above the inalienable rights of children to start out in life with a mother and a father.”

The new laws eradicate the need for surrogate couples to travel interstate for IVF.

Previously, women had to be infertile to qualify for fertility treatment, ruling out surrogate mothers and most single and lesbian women.

The legislation also gives gay partners and parents of surrogate children legal parenting rights and allows women to conceive using the sperm of their dead partners.

Paper Bag Princess Book

I know this is kind of late but...

I think that the Paper Bag Princess is a great book for all children to have. I wish that they had a book like that when I was growing up. It would have been nice to see the flip side of all the fairy tales we read.

When I become a parent one day I plan on purchasing this book for my children. Thanks for sharing it with us!

Men Working

So I don't know if anyone ever drives down comanche street in front of the alkek parking garage but for the past few weeks there have been people outside working on the garage. Everyone morning I drive by the garage to go to the LBJ parking garage and I notice a sign that says "men working". I found this to be crazy considering the society that we live in. This sign makes the inference that there are only men working on the parking garage and, of course, I found this extremely concerning to our society. Just wondering if anyone had noticed.

Dominance in Advertising 12/1

Today in class we looked over the magazine advertisements and one thing that I was noticing and we talked about a little was in some pictures the man is shown to be taller or above the woman to represent dominance or superiority. What I find interesting though is when I look at old family photographs of my great grandparents and other family from the early 1900's the husband is always depicted sitting in a chair with his wife standing next to him. I find it interesting that in some ways representation of how we percieve the male and female levels maybe has changed. In the old days the man was shown sitting down to possibly represent the man of the house, the head of the household. Respresentation has changed in the way that the man would need to be shown higher up physically to depict his dominance.

12/1

Today in class we discussed advertising. I am worried about young kids growing up and looking at advertisements that show women and men that have bodies that are not obtainable. I am worried because young kids grow up with this image of beauty in mind, and when that is not achieved is when low self esteem and eating disorders start happening. Average women do not look like the models in magazines, so why is there not more average looking people in them? If a clothing company is trying to sell clothes, why wouldnt they put them on a model that matches the people that are actually going to wear them. I know "sex sells" but when is society going to say enough is enough and not buy a product because there is a half naked woman selling it?

Pregnancy discrimination

According to the statutes under the federal Pregnancy Discrimination Act, employers must treat women affected by pregnancy, childbirth, or related medical conditions in the same manner as other employees or applicants with the same skills or limitations. As long as a woman is able to perform the essential functions of a job, an employer can't fire, refuse to hire, or deny a promotion to her because of a pregnancy-related condition. Furthermore, if she's willing and able to work, she can't be forced to take her pregnancy leave early. In general, pregnant women must be treated in the same way as any other temporarily disabled employee. This may mean employers must provide modified tasks, alternative assignments, or disability leave when a pregnant woman is temporarily unable to perform her job. Employers must also hold open a job for a pregnant woman the same length of time jobs are held open for employees on sick or disability leave, as well as provide the same level of medical benefits. In addition to the Pregnancy Discrimination Act, pregnant women may also have rights under the federal Family and Medical Leave Act as well as under individual state or local laws. If you think that you're the victim of pregnancy discrimination, you can file a complaint with the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission.

The Associate( Must See Movie)

Laurel Ayres is the smart and single woman trying to make it up the Wall Street corporate ladder, until one day she finds out that she is passed over for a promotion because she is a woman. Unable to face the fact that her less smart and sexist male protege (Frank) has now become her boss, she quits and tries to start up her own company only to find out that the male dominated world of Wall Street is not interested in taking an African American woman seriously, and thus is forced to create a fictional white man (Robert S. Cutty) in order to be judged on her own merits. Ayres financial wisdom is joined by the intelligent and computer-savvy secretary Sally Dugan who also was not properly recognized for her talents, and together they are able to become the most successful independent stock brokers in the world while helping a struggling high tech computer company stay afloat.

Laurel Ayres talks business at a party.

However, the ruse eventually runs into problems, as Cutty is still getting credit for Ayres great ideas, and competing firms and tabloid journalists are willing to do anything in order to bring the wealthy and elusive Cutty into the public and on their side. Thus Ayres is forced to get her gay best friend (who works at a nightclub as a female impersonator) to create an effective disguise in the mould of Marlon Brando to try and fool the naysayers; when that fails, she and Dugan decide to kill Cutty only to be charged with his murder. Frank uncovers the ruse and pretends that he is now the front man to world famous Cutty.

The film ends with Ayers donning the Cutty disguise one last time to attend a meeting of the exclusive gentlemen's club to accept Cutty's awards and unmasking herself in order to teach the male dominated industry the evils of racial and sexual discrimination. Ayers is finally given credit for her work and creates a huge business empire with her friends at the helm.

oh....and I think any person who touches a child like that should and will burn in hell

A little bit about all we've discussed lately

I haven't blogged in awhile. First I want to bring up one small point about walking to the car alone. I don't think it matters completely what your sex is. I think that men have just as much of a reason to be as careful as women. Sure they don't always have to be worried about being rapped but what about being robbed? Or being shot just because? Or even car-jacked? If someone wants a car or some money and they have a gun, I highly doubt that they are going to care what you sex is. If anything it's going to come down to appearance. Does this person look like they are well off? Women do however have that extra precaution of rap. Also they have less means to protect themselves. This is why I am all for self-defense classes and being extra careful at night. At work no one is allowed to leave by themselves after dark. Not even guys. I also carry mace and my keys laced in my fingers. It may seem silly to be on high alert all the time but I would rather be cautious and alive then carefree and dead. I think men should be just as alert as women. Anyone can become a victim.
Second I love talking about media influences on gender. It is so true and we know it but we eat it up anyhow. Why? Because it's common and accepted. I loved that book about the paperbag princess. I thought that was hilarious. However, you have to think about how many parents would really buy that for their children. I probably would because I think fairytales and romance movies in general are so unrealistic. Also I love shows like Sex and the City. Yes, they are still out looking for relationships but it's not the most important thing in their life. There is more content about jobs and family life and that it is possible to have a life after 35 when you are still not married. And of course they are still looking for relationships that work because who really wants to be alone forever? How realistic is that? But romance movies and TV shows suck for the most part. Disney movies are the worst. That's where it all starts. "What if prince charming had never shown up? Would Snow White have gotten up, gotten a job with a health care package and a baby from her local sperm bank?" Oh man, that quote is kind of depressing and funny at the same time.

A Late thank you

This is a few days late but I haven't had a chance to get on here. I would like to thank Dr. U and her courageous sister for being so open and honest with something that is so hard to be honest about. It was definitely a class perioud I will never forget, and in my four years of college i don't think I have had a class that I have ever felt so emotional about, and learned so much as well. This was en eye opener, and she nor Pam didn't have to do that at all but they chose to in order to help us and maybe let us educate others as well. I told my mom about it later that night and she was affected, as well as my little sister who I told later. So thank you again for being so honest and sharing that with us, it is something I will always remember.

11/19

Today in class we discussed gender and the media. I took a class this summer that was called women and minorities in the media. We looked at both gender and minorities in advertising, tv, movies, and mucis. One thing that was discussed was how men are portrayed as being masculine and put together. I think that has changed in more recent sitcoms. There are shows like, everybody loves raymond, King of Queens, and Yes dear where the husbands are portrayed as bumbling fathers; which I am not sure is much better. You see more and more the intelligence of fathers being portrayed negatively. I think there needs to be more shows about the average father, not one that is perfect but that does not have to depend on the woman for everything and that does not have questionable intelligence.

11/17

I would also like to thank Dr. Le Claire for being so open today in class and tell your sister Pam thank you sooo much for opening herslef to us, people that she has never met. I deeply feel conmcerned that abuse happens to more and more people and that it happens to more and more children. I am concerned that if people do not start educating themselves on this issue and taking action that this vicious cycle will just keep going. I am terrified to think about one day having kids and someone taking away their innocence and putting them through something that they never have to go through.

First I want to thank Pam...

and Dr. Le Claire for being so "naked" today! and then I wanted to say it here because I wasn't ready to in class.

Then I wanted to talk about the thing Pamela said today about when she was first raped that forever more you feel like predators seek you out like you have a big scarlet "S" on you that stands for "SLUT" that everyone can see. When I was young I had very bad things happen to me by some horrible people and I didn't know why these things kept happening to me.

It was years later when I heard it that there is indeed something about you that predators can sense on you and that made sense to me. Unfortunately they didn't tell me how I could undo it so that I can have normal relationships. When she talked about the addictions and the promiscuity and the self mutilations I was checking off a list in my head! To this DAY I have not and cannot keep a relationship going. I'll either sabotage it or something. Like I don't deserve good things.

Also like Pam I don't have a good relationship with my parents and early on I figured I just like to be by myself whenever family is concerned.

This is ironic that we had this happen today because I just got finished writing in my journal about how I'm going to start dealing with my life in little increments and start dealing with myself on a day to day basis because everything I'm dealing with gets too overwhelming! I also figured out that the reason I can't handle one of my addictions is because I guess deep down I think I should punish myself like I'm bad or something.

Execution for child rape?

A lawmaker recently returned from a tour of duty in Iraq is anticipating more combat over his effort to impose the death penalty on those who brutally rape children 12 and younger.

It would join first-degree murder, kidnapping resulting in death and treason as the only crimes punishable by death in Colorado.

The U.S. Supreme Court in 1977 ruled the death penalty is cruel and unusual punishment for convicted rapists but left the window open for states to impose the ultimate punishment on those who brutally rape children.

It was said in class yesterday that women are restricted by the fear we have to do things like walk to your car alone at night.  

I personally dont get scared doing things like that, but I see why many women do.  Because people have these ideas that women should be scared, it really does place huge restrictions on us, and I dont like it one bit when I think about it that way!

My ex- bf use to get mad at me if I ever left a bar to walk to my car by myself or anything like that.  It really would piss me off, because yea I guess something can happen, but im not going to live my life taking every precaution.  That issue of him being protective really put some unwanted restrictions on me.  Its not fair because he doesn't know how it feels to be labeled as the damsel in distress who can walk to her car!!

Reasons for Assault

A good friend of mine, we'll call her Monica, was raped a couple years ago. She was stopped at a gas station late at night after a concert. He snuck into her car, then came at her with a knife and made her drive away. After he finished everything, she asked him why he did it. I can't remember everything he said but I know a big part of it was that his mother had recently died and that he was not ok from that. Monica lost her mother a few years before this incident as well. She said "well my mom died too." He then responded with "Well I wouldn't have done this to you if I knew that."

She immediately went to the police. After she reported it and gave a description, five more girls came forward, saying they were attacked by someone with a similar description and at the same place or close by.

I don't think Monica or any of those girls were at fault by any means. People should be able to stop at a gas station without some jackass getting in the car and nearly killing them. Losing a family member is no excuse to hurt a complete stranger. Karma is a bitch, and it came to him. I seem to recall he was found in Mexico and was severely beat by the mexican police. Serves him right...

11/12

Today in class a topic came up that I am sure every girl can relate to. The topic is being yelled or commented at by construction workers. I do not know how many times this has happened. I think that if more women would say something when this happens that maybe the guys would get a hint that women do not like this. When I was in highschool I stopped by the gas station before school to get a drink and this guy sitting in the abck of a truck started making comments. I turned around and told him that I was only 16 yrs old and how would he like it if his daughter was getting hit on by a dirty old man. Needless to say he did not say anything to me as I left the store. Another thing about this topic is that sometimes people in power demonstrate this type behavior and the person does not know how to react. Again, when I was in highschool I was at the gas station, this time getting gas, and a cop drove up along side of me car said " Hey, I like your license plate holder". Ok, I had a convertible and the license plate holder said "On hot days I go topless", but I was 16 and I thought it was fun! But this is not the most disturbing part, after the cop drove off he went to talk to a state trooper and the next thing I know the state trooper is staring at me. I just felt very uncomfortable. Most people would say that I was asking for it because my license plate holder was drawing attention to me, but I put it on there because I though it was fun and it was my first car and I wanted to make it pretty. I do not think that in any way was i asking to get hit on.

North Country

I have seen his movie before and understood what the movie was about and what she was fighting for. But watching it in class really opened my eyes to the small details, like in the bosses office at the mine he had a calendar with a half naked girl and her legs were wide open. I mean those kind of things I didn't see the first time I watch it. I found my self tearing up at the same parts that I teared up when I watched it the first time. This movie is very emotional and gets the idea and point across very well.
I also thought it was funny that she asked why no one picked on Gloria. The men may not have done the disgusting things to Gloria that they did to the other women but she faced her own struggles inside the Union meetings. When they brushed off all her ideas and opinions and made jokes about it. Gloria didn't have the same power as the men and was out numbered.

GREAT MOVIE and I enjoyed watching it very much. This is an extreme version of what is still going on in the work force today. For and example: I worked as a cocktail waitress for 2 weeks, basically worked the training. It was at the Sports Bar Legends in Austin and my ass got grabbed a few times and the men actually dropped the glasses on purpose so I would have to bend over and clean them up. I got called honey, sugar lips, miss thang, darling, and many other things that were degrading to me. Sexual harassment and thinking of women on a lower level is still prevalent in today's society yet it is not as blatantly obvious as it was in this movie. (Men get sexually harassed as well)

Male Generic Language

I have a teacher that noticed he kept saying "you guys" when he talked to us. He said he recognized that you guys doesn't refer to females, so he decided to start saying "you students." He corrected himself several times that particular day, saying "you g, you students." Now he's back to the "you guys." It doesn't offend me at all when people say that. I thought it was funny that he said students instead...it just doesn't sound right. I applaud his recognition but, either way, it made me laugh.

11/3

Today in class we watched the movie North Country. I have never seen this movie before and I am shocked at what she had to go through. It is hard to believe that women were treated so badly, but then i realize that this still happens today and that women are not the only ones that get harrassed at work. I just cant wait to finish the movie on wednesday.

Dating your close friends.

I have never dated any of my close friends because I was always afraid that if I did, it not workout and we would never be friends again or have a good relationship. I seen many of my friends in high school date their close friends and it was a disaster. My senior year in high school people started thinking that my best friend Jonathan and I liked each other, and so everyone started pressuring us to get together. I did not like him that way so we never got together. I knew that things would not work out between us and so I avoided that situation and we are still best friends today. I always told myself that "I rather have this great friendship than ruin it when I knew I did not feel that way about him."

The Door Test

The Door Test is when a guy locks both doors when he gets out the car. He opens the door for the young lady and walks around the back of the car to look in the back window to see if she unlocks his door before he gets to it. If the lady doesnt unlock his door, then he is suppose to dump her because she is a selfish broad. Granted most people have power locks now a days, so there is no need to unlock the door. So how can a guy know if a girl is really the one?

10/29

Today in class we discussed scripts for dating. When we were in groups, I noticed that the majority of the gender specific "rules" that my group came up with could apply two both sexes. I believe that in order to have a relationship progress both people must have the desire to put in the effort to do so.I believe that every couple comes up with their own set of rules. There is not one couple that expects the same things from their partner. One rule that is within my relationship is to have expressed appreciation. What I mean by this is, for example, while my boyfriend is at work on fridays I normally start/sometimes finish his laundry for him. When he gets home he tells me thank you and that he really appreciates it.I have told him before that I do not mind doing things for him as long as they are appreciated, and that as soon as I feel that they are not appreciated I will stop doing them. The same thing applies when he buys dinner. I always tell him thank you. I think what is wrong with some of the scripts or rules that are expected today is that because people do expect them they do not appreciate them, or they do not verbally express their appreciation. SAY THANK YOU PEOPLE!!!

Do men gossip??

SO, the class discussion today was talking about whether guys gossip like girls do. I believe that guys do gossip, but not to the extremes like girls do. I know for a fact they do! One day, a good friend of mine, who is a boy, came up to me and told me that some of his friends were talking about me and their game. My name had come out of no where. Well this other guy was gossiping about me and telling of false information. So my good guy friend asked me not to say anything cause he didn't want drama or he didn't want the other guy knowing that he had told me. Well, i confronted him the next night actually. And come to find out, he tried denying it! That's what some girls do whenever they get caught gossiping about others!

To answer the question, do men gossip. The answer is YES! Even when you're not even around or your name comes out of no where, they do gossip. They just don't want to say they do because it's not in the manly nature to gossip like girls. Although girls do take way more out of control then guys, but they still do!

:)

10/27

Today in class we talked about how women are more likely to talk about eachother behind their backs than men. I think we are giving men too much credit. They can be just as pitty as women can. I have many guy friends and they talk just as much about eachother as my friends and I do. Men talk about eachother, but in a different way. Men, in my experience, talk about how the other guy is not "lucky" when it comes to the ladies, or how the other guy is lazy at work. When women talk about other women it is mostly about physical and sexual characteristics. Basically what I am saying is that men may think that they do not talk about other men behind their backs but they do. The main difference between men and women in this aspect is the content that is being discussed.

Drill Team

This maybe off subject from what most people are blogging about, but when I was in high school, I was on a drill team (dance team) of 81 female students. It was the worst year of high school for me. Most girls stayed in drill team all 3 years (sophmore-sr.). Me, I only stayed the first year and quit. Girls are so hard on one another. Constantly girls were criticizing other girls about their weight, dance skills, make up, hair styles, clothes, etc. I got so tired of being crtiqued for everything about myself, that I had to quit. I had the worst self-esteem that year. We had one girl that was quite over weight and had to keep her dance out-fit together by pins. So many girls would make fun of her, I felt bad for her, because she was one of the best dancers. The thing that bothered me most, is that our dance coach would not order her a new outfit in her size. There used to be a "weight limit for the dancers" a long time ago when the team was first put together. But it has been over 50 years since it started, and the school refuses to buy bigger outfits. Only allowing the skinny girls a chance to feel comfortable and join the dance team. I think the school and facutly views the dance team as the school's "sex objects." I did not want to be apart of something so vain, so I quit, and made the best decision for myself. I just don't know why girls are so hard on each other, guys aren't like that to one another as harsh.

Free Religion

This is a late post but about 2 weeks ago Dr. L-U made it a point to tell all of us that the author of our book sometimes leaves religion on the back burner. I thought it was really awesome how she made it a point to say that we shouldn't forget about that and our personal beliefs, whatever they may be, should play a role in how we learn about and analyze communication and gender. Two thumbs up!

Sororities!!

        Years ago, when I was a freshman I rushed and joined one of the, to remain anonymous, sororities.  All of the senior girls who rushed me and wanted me to join sooooo bad were sooo pretty, and sooo blond, and hot...etc.. 

          I love heels, and getting all dolled up like you do for rush, but I also have a tom-boy side.  I wear a sideways hat and board shorts when I go ride my longboard.  

        After rush I remember seeing the older hot girls who wanted me to join when I wasn't dolled up, and I got treated a lot differently! Funny actually, I saw one of these girls once when I had to run in a store and get some beer to go float.  I didnt have any shoes on and I looked like a TOTAL scrubb (we were on our way to the river!!).  She had the most awkward and surprised look on her face when I said hi to her and her friends.... and I thought she liked me sooooo much???

         I will agree with the ideas that fraternities and sororities have underlying pressures that enforce gender stereotypes. I felt like some of the girls in the sorority held everyone to these stereotypes of us having to be girly and pretty all the time.  

Hug Day

When I was in high school, our principal brought in a group of people that conducted a "challenge day." It was much like a diversity training. It was good that they brought these people into the school because everyone should be aware of differences, however the day turned into a cry fest. Much like on The Office, they pointed out peoples differences. We had to get into groups and talk about ways we were oppressed. Our vice principal was in my group and he talked about the issues of segregation his family encountered when he was a child. He broke down, along with several others. It then turned into everyone having to hug each other. After all of that, we called it "hug day."

Talking about diversity is important and people need to recognize that we are all different and have different feeling. Things like this, however, are not necessary. I shouldn't have to feel bad about myself or be brought to tears because I may or may not have had a more challenging life than others. Pointing out differences in an emotional way like these people did does not help awareness positively, it just makes you feel like crap.

10/20

Today in class we discussed Affirmative Action. I think that it is a good thing, however i think people take more advantage of it than good that it gives back to the public. My dad knew a guy in law school who filled out his whole application in Spanish, the guy could not speak one word of spanish. But because the admissions people did not know that he had his whole tuition paid for. I do not think that this is right at all, i think that this should help people that actually qualify for the policy, obviously this guy didn't.

so this isn't really on topic for what we were talking about in class but its gender related for sure. So yesterday i was with my boyfriend his brother and his brothers girlfriend who is also my best friend. we were on our way somewhere and stopped sonic to get food. well the person that brought us our food was a transgendered individual. the reason i know this is because my best friend whom i was with and i went to highschool with her. And in highschool she was a he, but now she is clearly a she. honestly i didn't even recognize her the first time i saw her after her change. what upset me about this was that when my boyfriend and his brother found out they were completely disgusted and kept referring to this individual as "him" i would correct them and say "her" and they would yell at me and be like NO thats DUDE. i tried to be as calm as i could when explaining to them that because that person is transgendered that they are now a female but the would have none of it. Now i'm conservative on most things but this is one aspect where i fall slightly liberal. Honestly, i feel that transgendered people are born in the wrong body and struggle with that their whole life. No one would just choose it unless they were miserable the other way. that is what i tried to explain to the guys but all that they were say is no, thats disgusting, he's gay. which is completely false because just because someone is transgendered doesn't make them a homosexual. It frustrated me the most because my boyfriend is usually open minded and willing to accept other peoples views. maybe it was just the influence of his brother and the feeling like if he accepted that person as a female it would make him less masculine. i dunno but it made me so mad!

Something I was thinking about this weekend

I stopped to think about my parents and their jobs, my brothers and theirs, and even my grandparents and boyfriends and so forth.....here is what I found

Mom- accountant
Dad-engineer
Brother-Machinist
Brother- College--working on becoming a sports journalist
Me-Sales
Boyfriend-landscaping, and outdoor work
Best friend (female)- 4th grade teacher
Grandma- Nurse
Grandpa-Worked in a cheese factory
Grandma-Stay at home mom
Grandpa- Janitor


Now just looking at these jobs, they all fit into what is stereotypically seen for men a women....I just thought it was interesting...look at the people in your life how do they fit in to these stereotypical view. =)

So this was something I found to be ironic in class when we talked about the idea that due to the fact that women have children then they are charged a higher insurance; however medically we have better health compared to men and men are more likely to have a heart attach due to their work enviornment. So I guess the solution would be to charge the women the higher insurance until they cant have children anymore and then when the men hit the target age for stress related illnesses then charge them; whatever the case I found it to be completly unfair to try and justify all of these rules against women just becuase they may be a mother on day.

10/15

Today in class we discussed women in the workplace. I agree with what was said in class reguarding womens job choices are seen as helping people so that is all the reward one should need. Womens jobs that "help" people and the ones with lower paying professions. I think that because they are helping peole that they should recieve higher salaries.
Another thing that was discussed was women not asking for higher salaries or raises. I think that this is an issue, however we have socialized women not to be assertive and ask for what they want. Women are supposed to be passive, and asking for more money is not very passive. So, should women be active and ask for more money; which goes against what they have been taught their whole lives; or should they be passive and society as a whole work together to get women better salaries?

Does it make a difference?

I always find it interesting when people bring up the "working mother" issue. My mom was a single woman for a great deal of my early years and I spent most of my time in daycare or with my grandma. She didn't become a stay-at-home mom until I was 9 and my brother was born. Sometimes I do feel like there is a wall between my mother and I, like we aren't as close as we could be. I often wonder how different our relationship would be if she had been able to stay at home when I was young. It has taken me a long time to be open and honest with her about things that are complicated. I often find myself thinking "This is my mom which makes this conversation weird and uncomfortable". It did get easier the more time we spent together. I also wonder if it had an affect on my personality. My mom and I are so different I can't even believe that we are related sometimes. I take after my grandma in almost every aspect of my personality and I never really thought about why that is. I relate to people different than she does also. She is such a people person and I have little tolerance for them. So do you think it makes a difference only in your relationship with the parent who is never home? Or does it make a difference in all your relationships?

Does it really matter?

I worked in a restaurant where one of the male managers was very cool and laid back. The only problem was that he fell in that sexual harrassment category every once and a while. I was helping him out in the kitchen one day when he looked over and said, "when did you get that ass?" From that moment on, he always made a comment. At first I just laughed at him but after a while I got a little disgusted. It wasn't only with me when he would say inappropriate things. If there was ever a group of females clustered together at one point, he would walk by and say "I love my wife, I love my wife..." He would stand around with other male servers and talk about it too.

He did ask me once if it bothered me. I said it was a little odd considering he was old enough to be my father. It didn't stop him from his comments. Even though I wasn't completely up front by saying "yes you are crossing a line," I did make a point that I wasn't exactly comfortable with it. Does that automatically give males the right to continue? Does it really matter what I say? I told him, indirectly, that it was wrong, but it didn't stop him at all. This is one little thing that makes it hard for a female to be comfortable at work. It may not be a corporate business or a "power suit" kind of place but we all still deserve the respect!

Work place full of dudes!

I work in an office totally surrounded by men. I am the youngest single female in my division, ok so maybe the only single female in my division. I get along well with every one except for time to time there is the occasional sexist comment that really does step on my toes. Today we talked about men and women in the work place and although I do feel that it is getting better where woman are more equals, there still seems to be the occasional idea that woman can not do a "man's" job. For instance, some times my boss will not send me out to do work but instead will ask one of the other guys to do it. I have had to speak up a few times and tell him "Hey, I can take care of it." Also, I know that women are usually seen as the big gossipers and talkers in the office, but men have just as big as a problem with it. Most of everything I hear in the office is from guys, fotunately I take it with a grain of salt. It seems to me that when a male co-worker makes a mistake they are slapped on the hand and told to not do it again, or they laugh about it. I on the other hand will hear about a mistake for days to come. Granted I do not make as many mistakes as my male co-workers so this is sometimes something I can only assume as being a negative remark being directed towards me for being female. So, yes I am venting a little and I'm sorry but really it is something that I have to struggle with. What keeps me going though is that I do have other male co-workers that really value the work that I do. Right now I'm worried about not getting a promotion because a male co-worker is going to be after the same job. Fortunately he is a friend of mine but this also poses a problem. How can I fight for a better position in a work environment that is strictly male with out having to push the envelope?The thing is, is that I would love the job but not only is a friend out for the same one but also I know that it will be more difficult with this different group of men because of the teasing and talk that they do about me.

Why do women get treated differently in the work place?

In class today, we discussed the different sex objects that men and women encounter, especially pertaining to work. Everyone knows the stereotypical type of home, where the man is the sole provide and works & the women stays at home cleaning.cooking/taking care of the kids. Why is it now that whenever a women is in the work force with a higher status, like be boss or head sales director, she is only viewed as an emploee not as a women?

Yes, men do get treated different in the sense that we assume that they should be providing for the family and that they should be the ones that go to work. But with women, it seems as if they can't have a high status in the work force because they are viewed as not intelligent enough, they just can't do it, or they shouldn't be because a male can do it better. For example, my step-mom. I admit she is very bubbley and may come across as the "dumb-blonde" to people that first meet her, but she is actually very smart and is good at what she does at work. She has worked hard with her business and raised her kid, but yet it seems like she doesn't get enough credit because she is in a more male dominated business. I know this cause i've gone to work with her several times.

Besides the point, women should not be under-estimated when it comes to how much and well they can handle work. And men should not have all the pressures of being the main provider and should dominate everything. Both genders should be accepted the way they are and that's that!

:)

I am going to look at this from the other angle. I feel men stay at home more than woman after high school based soley on lack of everyday chores. Most men are unfamiliar on how to cook or do laundry by themself. Also it is socially acceptable that girls how more friends with which they could share an apartment with. But mainly for both sexes it comes down to money. If you or youre parents have money there is no question about leaving home. Everyone needs freedom and there isnt much at home.

Living with the 'rents or paying rent?

So I have an older brother and a younger brother who are both now over the age of 18. When they both turned 18 my parents started charging them rent to live at home in order to get them out quicker and to "grow them up". However, when I turned 18 they never said a word. I lived at home till I was 20 and now am at school and have never paid a dime and they pay for my school and rent even here (I do work for anything extra that I want or need though). The thought occurred to me though that it is more socially acceptable for a women to live at home longer than for males. If a 22 or 23 year old female lives at home I see that as more socially acceptable but if I hear about a 21 year old living with his parents I think of him as a lazy. Why does society expect males to move out of their parents home earlier than females? Both sexes are getting married later and later now days so shouldn't it be acceptable for men to live at home longer or should it be expected that women find their own places younger and get out on their own? Just a thought.

Sex discrimination?

We discussed it, I believe last week, how woman would be taken advantage of is certain areas; especially with those dealing with cars. I myself am very embarrassed to say that I was charged THIRTY DOLLARS to have a knick repaired in my windshield. When I went to have it taken care of the man LITTERALLY looked me up and down and gave me the price!! Another time also had to do with my car. I was getting a tired replaced and them men at shop tried to tell me all these other things that were wrong. I told them that I would take it into consideration about the repairs and have them looked at later on... There was nothing wrong with my car.
Yesterday we talked about the education system and differences between boys and girls. I also went to a very small school where I had the same teachers as my older siblings. Luckily for me the faculty was not very discriminatory. Yah there were considered differences between boys and girls but from what I had found and looking back now we were treated fairly. In high school that was not the case. Male teachers, most of them athletic coaches treated the "pretty" girls with special attention. (yes, I went to one of those types of schools) The boys in athletics were also given lead way. If you weren't an athlete then there wasn't too much you could do in those classes.

10/8

Today in class we talked about how in school boys and girls are treated differently. We barely touched on the fact that most of us have siblings. Dr. Leeclaire mentioned that some of us probably had the same teachers as one of our siblings. I am the middle child. I had so many of the same teachers as my older brother. When i was in 3rd grade I had the same teacher that my older brother had the previous year. My teacher had the never to ask my mom if me and my brother had the same biological father because we were so different. (he was very hyper and i was calm and a "good" student) But what was not fair is that he is a boy and as discussed in class they have more energy and differnt personalities as girls do. I think that as a teacher, part of your responsibility is to treat everyone the same.

Gender differences in education

In class this morning, the topic discussion was focusing on gender in education. Our teacher brought a very good point about in our early years of education, like elementary and middle school, it is predominantly female teachers. I remember my fifth grade teacher being a male and he was the only male teacher in that grade. But when i look back at it now, whenever i talked to him years later, he's gay. Which there is nothing wrong with that at all, but it just shows more feminine attributes in a female dominated career. In high school, i was a cheerleader. When i think about all of the female teachers i had, there were not that many, but the male teachers were there one's i usually got.

I'm not sure if it was because i was in sports, being a girl cheerleader grades were helped out on occasion because my coach talking to them and saying how important it was to be in the games. But rarely did i ever have female teachers. Why is that?? The early stages of learning are mostly females, but later years once the sports come into play, it's mostly male teachers. Does the male vs. female education role depend on whether or not you're in sports!?

:)

Sex appeals

Okay, so in class the other day there was a big discussion on women using their sex appeal to get certain things vs. when women get taken advantage of when a male is not present. When it comes to dealing with a car, buying or maintenance, whenever there is no male present, women sure as hell get taken advantage of. I know when I got to get an oil change, they come back and say that there is all this other stuff that needs to be fixed. One time i actually fell for it, and ended up getting yelled at by my dad because they charged me $20 for a little air filter when you can probably buy one for like $5 at PepBoys.

On the other hand, women do use their sex appeal to get certain things they want. I think there is nothing wrong with this at all, I will admit that i've done it several times!! Especially when it comes to getting out of tickets.. But it's not just the women using their sex appeal to get away with things, the males have their moments too. One of them being selling things and trying to overpower the woman. In a situation when a male is clearly needed, they take it to full advantage and embrace the moment.

Overall, using one's sex appeal to get certain things is not wrong at all. It's simply normal and i'm sure everyone has done it one time or another, even if they didn't even realize they're doing it or not!

:)

Just a thought on gender issues in my life

My boyfriend just got an amazing job and he is going to get paid lots of money.  He is moving for his job and we will probably fly to see each other. With the career path im taking, I wont be making any money when I graduate, and will have to move in with my parents for a while.  

I have been brought up to be very independent,  (even though I will need some support from the rents when I graduate!) and never like the stereotypes of dating such as men always paying, driving, etc... I like to be the one in charge sometimes.  I like to be pampered, sure, but I also like to be in control and do some of the wine and dining... I guess I just have some more masculine traits. 

My boyfriend loves the idea that he is about to be my "sugar daddy." He will be able to afford paying for flights, and expensive b-day/anniversary/Christmas gifts.  I fell horribly uneasy about this situation.  I feel like most girls would looove it and take advantage of it, but its really been bothering me.  Although I do find myself dropping hints about some gifts I want... haha

I guess its true what we hear in class. Some girls want to be treated  totally equal but the minute they have a flat tire, or in my case, gifts and flights, they are glad to enact the stereotypes despite any uneasy feelings about the situation.  

Women: Flirt or Fight?

Yesterday in class we went back to the subject of whether women should be more aggressive since they sometimes get taken advantage of when it comes to making deals with men. Whether it be buying a car, getting a bank loan, or anything we always talk about how they are taken advantage of because people think they don't know any better. Society says they should be more aggressive when negotiating and "do it like a man."  But then we also talk about how instead of negotiating like males, females will wine and cry and bitch until they get what they want.  And then there is also the viewpoint that women can flirt their way out of things.  I will say honestly I have used my sex appeal to get what I want before.  Am I wrong in doing so if society tells me it is ok? Which one of these tactics is the right one? Or are there any?

When people choose to drink an excessive amount of alcohol and that leads to them being rapped, that is only their fault. Now when it happens totally sober then that is when it should be reported and people should go to jail for doing such a morally wrong thing. It is something nobody should experience and can mentally affect someones life. But I agree with Prof. LeClair that probaly half of the total number of rapes arent even reported which is sad.

Victim or Predator

In class we talked about the victim being blamed when he/she is raped. Dr.LeClair said that it is a problem that we blame the victim more and not the rapist. This topic has always had me on the fence. Because I have witnessed girls that have been under the influence and made some choices that they were not proud of and called rape the next day or when people started finding out. However I do know some girls that this legitemently happened to. So this is where it gets fuzzy and gray to me. Why do some girls feel like calling rape on a guy that she regrets is a way out? Its not. This is one of the problems that leads to society thinking that the victim is to blame, when that is not always the case. This really makes me angry.

Women getting blamed for looking cute....

Judging women by what they wear

Two years ago, I went down town with one of my friends and I was wearing white shorts and a black and white stripped shirt (slightly low cut), and heels. This was the style back then and still maybe who knows. Anyways I went over to a girlfriends house up in Austin right after I got off work and had my change of clothes with me. Later that night I drove back to San Marcos, when I got home I went over to my boyfriends (ex boyfriend shorty after this incident..) and his mouth dropped open and then he said, "If you were to wear a cops uniform what do you think people would think you are?"
I replied "a cop."
He said, "Yeah and so if you wear a sluts uniform what do you think people will think you are?"

WOW! Okay this just goes a long with what we were talking about in class with men putting the blame on women for men viewing us (women) a certain way. This situation above suggest that if I was rapped or called a slut that night it would BE MY FAULT as a women, just because I was wearing a ''cute and in style outfit" down town.

Ciara Proves She’s All Woman

Since the first photos of Ciara posing in the buff for Vibe Magazine hit the net, fans and non fans alike have been wondering why Ciara, a singer who has been relatively modest about her displaying her sexuality, would make such a bold move and disrobe for all of the world to see. Well, one quick glance at a quote from the magazine pretty much tells the tale. “They said I was a man! It doesn’t get any worse than that”. It appears all those nasty internet rumors about the singer forced her to make a very in your face statement about what she was working with. 

Warren Buffet and lack of Parent bonding

Buffett revered his father, a stockbroker who became a four-term Congressman, he had a complex relationship with his mother. A model housewife to the outside world, his mother would "verbally lash" the young Buffett and his older sister for hours, until the children wept. Buffett says that when his mother died he cried not because he was sad but "because of the waste. She had her good parts, but the bad parts kept me from having a relationship with her."

men against violence

so today in class we talked about mens movements and some of them being men against violence. I think these are great organizations for men to be involved in however it got me thinking of my experience with men i knew in organizations like that. My ex-boyfriends best friend was the president of MAV (men against violence) and he was one of the rudest people i have ever met, unless he really liked you. I never witnessed him be physically violent with women but he was verbally abusive all the time. I would walk into their apartment to see my boyfriend and get a "hey slut" or a "hey bitch" all the time. It offended me at first but then i just got used to the fact that thats just how he is. However it gives a negative vibe to an organization if their president acted that way. Now i don't know if he was really in the organization for the right reasons or if it was just to look good on a resume but either way i think its wrong. If you're going to take a stand on such a strong topic like that it needs to be consistent through out your life.

9/22

Today in class we talked about the mens movement. I think that men are overlooked when it comes to suffereing or needing something. People think that men are supposed to have it all figured out and not need anyones help. Because the fact that men are supposed to not need anyones help it is hearder for them to ask for it. I believe that men are just as negatively portrayed as women. If a man can't take care of his family by himself, then he is a "loser", if a man can but doesnt spend much time with his family then he is a "horrible dad". Sometimes they just can't win.

On the right track?

Sunday night, I went to dinner with my parents. At the table behind us, there was a family that consisted of the parents and two boys under the age of 6. I overheard the mother say to the youngest son, who appeared to be around 3 years old, "big boys don't whine." He followed up with "yeah, they don't cry either." The mother then said, "sure they do, everyone cries." I didn't hear a word from the father. I was happy to hear the mother say that because I definately think that it should be acceptable for men/boys to show their emotions. I think the mother is on the right track by teaching her boys that it is ok to cry.

Guys Wearing Make Up

We briefly discussed the issue of the children playing with make up. My major interest is trying to discover why is it ok for a man to wear make up when he is modeling or acting, or any type of business that requires him to be behind a camera but not in everyday public.I know its not socially acceptable for a man to do this in public or behind close doors, yet nobody complains when they see their favorite actor, model, or tv personality wearing Mac make up on live tv exposed to the world. 50 cent, LL Cool J, Arnold Schwarzenegger, all these big muscled bound guys wearing "women products" because they want to be pretty on tv. Tyson Beckford and Ashton Kutcher modeling with lip gloss, but nobody ever says anything. So should a man not wear make up, or only under certain circumstances?

Drunken Women and Men

Why is it okay for a man to get drunk and his friends think it is cool, but when I girl gets drunk a guy and his friends are like "man you could hit that". Is it socially acceptable for women to be drunk in public? If it is then at what age does it change to it NOT being socially acceptable?

9/17

Today in class we discussed how society makes things popular. This is true, even if it degrades women, as long as it sounds or looks cool then society is, for the most part ok with it. The issue of Hooters and if there were a male version if it would work. I do not think a male version of Hooters would work because for one it is socially accecptable for women to go to Hooters to eat. I do not think that men would be comfortable eating a restaurant where men are walking around with tight shirts on with a speedo, or shirtless. Society says what is ok for men and women, and men attending a male version of Hooters would not be ok. To me there is nothing wrong with Hooters, I have eaten there multiple times. However, I think it would be completely different if it was an all male restaurant.

I my experience when dealing with any "handyman" they have always been curtious but at the same time I feel that they try to either dumb down when they are talking to females or in some instances try to take advantage of the situation by trying to make it seem as though they need unnecessay parts to be replaced.

9/15

Today in class we discussed how children tend to find a romantic partner that is like their parents. I do not think that this is always the case, well not with me anyways. My boyfriend has completely different interests and hobbies as my dad. My dad is a football kind of guy and has a "white collar" job. My boyfriend on the other hand loves to hunt and fish. His job is hard very physical work. However, even with the differences that they have, they have the same heart. They are both loving, caring, and responsible people. I think that is the most important. I do not think that a woman should find an exact replica of her dad, because no one is going to be the dad that she grew up with. But, she can find someone that will love her and wil hold the same personality and character traits.

Women and Car dealerships/ Poll

I agree with some of the other women in class that felt like every time they went to the car mechanic for one problem that they were told a list of things that needed to be fixed. I recently experienced that very problem again when I took my car in after it would not jump-start. Although I was only wanting the battery fixed, I was given a whole list of things that need to fixed. This list with quoted parts and labor was outrageous! I usually get my father on the phone to straighten the mechanics out so I don't get screwed. I have tried to get out of these situations myself but the mechanics don't seem to take me seriously, which creates more anger on my end. It is very frustrating that I can not go see a car mechanic and have a pleasant experience without feeling like I am being had. I think it is sad that the male car mechanics only take other men seriously and disregard women as being capable of knowing when they are being screwed. I usually know when I am being screwed but I just can not get the mechanics to take my no for an answer.

I was raised to be a very independent woman but this is one issue I have yet to master a sense of independence from.

How about the women in the class:

Do you think mechanics take women seriously?
Yes/No/Neutral

If No, do you feel like you have to have a man there with you or get a man to speak for you?
Yes/No/Neutral

If Yes to above, do you think having to rely on a man for this is OK?
Yes/No/Neutral

How about the men in the class:

Do you think mechanics take women seriously?
Yes/No/Neutral

If No, do you suggest to the women in your life that you or another man goes with them or speaks for them?
Yes/No/Neutral

If Yes to above, do you think women relying on you or other men to take of this is OK?
Yes/No/Neutral

Discussion in class on the 10th

The way I was raised, I would almost consider, I got the best of both gender worlds. I grew up with an older brother and sister and with that they both treated me differently yet also the same. My brother for example used to say "I don't have a brother so I am going to treat you like a boy." This might be the reason I did grow up more like a "tom-boy." I loved to play with the stereotypical Barbies and such but I also loved to play with fast cars and was even given a Tonka Truck for my birthday. I loved that thing! It was a dump truck so creating roads and making sand castles was exciting. It might be because of this I always seemed to like to hang out with the guys more. I always enjoyed listening to my dad's and brother's conversations much more and when I became a teenager I had more guy friends. Until college I refused to wear pink or anything that I would consider overly girly.
I think that because I as grown up this way I feel it is a good way to raise a child in such a world that is either one way or the other. I wasn't pansied and turned into a girl that can't take care of herself, I was raised to be strong woman that can look out for myself and also know that I deserve to be treated like a lady by a real man.

Today in class we talked about how people are gender stereotyped even before they are born and it got me thinking about what my parents did for my brothers and i when we were born. My parents decided not to find out the sex of my brothers or i before we were born and i was the third born. Having already been pregnant with two boys my mother was POSITIVE i was a boy (though she didn't know for sure) and painted my room blue, only picked out a boys name and was totally prepared for me to be a boy. well suprise suprise i was a girl, and they were both shocked but excited. However they didn't make any changes into what they had already planned (besides my name of course) my room was kept blue and in most of my baby pictures i was wrapped in a blue blanket my mom had made for me while she was pregnant. Thinking back on my childhood i have to agree with one of the other students who said today that she grew up with brothers and prefered playing with them and their toys. I was the same way, i think because they were my role models from a young age. I still liked playing with dolls and some girlie things but mostly i wanted to be like my brothers and most of my friends were boys up until middle school. I think its been an advantage for me not growing up as a "girlie girl" because even though now as an adult i like to dress up and look pretty i still can be a tom-boy and play sports and hang with the guys, which i think is beneficial.

Money in the relationship..

Okay, so today in class we had this huge discussion about chivalry and who should pay for what in a relationship. First on the chivalry part, it's always polite when a man opens the door for a woman or when he lets her have his seat on the bus. But this is 2008, not the medievil times! Women shouldn't always complain about not getting the door opened for them or a seat. Sometimes they might need to give up their own, like when someone said about the man holding his two kids and no one got up for him, but her. Now that's being polite and everyone should be polite! It's common sense.

Who pays for what in the relationship?? No, it should not always be the man. Maybe in the beginning of the relationship when ya'll are dating and he's trying to start something. But as time goes by, there is that imaginary line when it's just time for the woman to start paying for the man. I enjoy buying my boyfriend things and taking him out to dinner, it's not being a sugarmama! It's just giving his wallet a break all those times he took me out and now it's my turn to treat him!!

:)

9/10

Today in class we discussed men being the ones within a relationship to pay for things. I think that men should pay for things but the woman should pay sometimes. A woman should not expect a man to take on that responsibility all of the time. Men like to be treated sometimes too. I think that it should be equal responsibility. I know within my relationship I pay sometimes. I think that it is healthy for our relationship for him to know that I do not want a sugar daddy. I want someone who can afford to take me out but does not necessarily have to pay all of the time. When you are in a serious relationship I believe that the concept of "who pays" becomes less important.

Gender differences in showing emotion

I grew up in a house where my little brother and I were both taught as children to keep our emotions locked up. Neither my brother nor I were allowed to show any emotion when we felt it.

I can see gender differences in how this has affected my brother and I. My brother and I both went through a period of time where we would have outburst (during our teen years) of emotion because we could only hold them in for so long.

I believe I had an easier time getting back in touch with my emotions so that I could show them when they came up because unlike my brother I was not plagued by the gender stereotype that most of world holds that men have to hold their emotions in and be strong. I believe this stereotype is making it a struggle for my brother to break the chain of what we were taught as children.

I hope that I have been a positive influence on my little brother by encouraging him that showing his emotion does not mean that he is a sissy or less of a man, but that it actually makes him more of a man!

Homosexuality in todays world

When I was in middle school and high School I played tennis, basketball and track. I knew lots of girls that were on sports teams as well, and we were all great friends. Once we graduated high school, and I still hung out with about 9 of the girls. Of those 9 girls 6 of them came out and told everyone that they were homosexuals. After further discussion with them about why they didn't come out earlier if they knew many years ago, they told me that if they would have come out in high school that is would not have been socially right and every one would have changed the way they acted around her and her friends.

The fact that this is actually reality that homosexuals face this every day, bothers me. People should be able to accept who they are, and at the same time be able to express that. But like my friends said social acceptance plays a huge role in the way people act, dress, talk, or base their sexual habits in the world today.

But if you notice, same sex marriage is becoming more acceptable. Massachusetts has recognized same-sex marriage since 2004, and California since May of 2005. And in like 5 other states they have what is called "legal unions", almost like common law marriage. This excited me to know that views and ideas on this topic are changing in drastic numbers. But social acceptance and the restraints it puts on society is still there and I am afraid it will always be there.

Acceptance

In class today we talked about acceptance of different lifestyles. We watched clips on the transgender girl from America's Next Top Model and I was saddened when one of the girls was outcasting her because she was transgender. Her only reasoning for it was because she came from a Southern little town where that is just not acceptable. Who is she to judge someone she doesn't even know just because she is "different" than her. I believe it all comes from how you were raised.
I come from a Christian family but I know that my family would not outcast anyone just because of their lifestyle. I have a best friend whom I've known for almost all my life and she has a three year old son. Her husband is very close-minded to say it in a polite way. One day my best friend and I went shopping and her son came along. Well when we got into the jewlery section he picked up a tiara and started playing with it. My friend and I thought this was too cute so we took a picture of him with it on. When his father saw it he was furious! He said don't ever put that stuff on him again. I asked him why and he said because his son was not a homo. (his words not mine) I was just astonished but that is how his father is. His son has to do guy things and play with guy things. Some of my best friends are gay and I love them even more because everyday they are faced with close-minded people but they overcome it.
We can't help how our parents teach us things growing up but we don't have to do the same thing with our own children. People of different race, color, sex, lifestyles, etc. should be accepted for who they are. Never judge a book by its cover!

Leave the Jonas Bro's Alone

Today (9/8) in class, it was brought up how the Jonas Brothers were picked on at the VMA's for wearing promise rings.  It was also brought up the Brittany and Jessica were in the spot light because of their sex lives as well.  

I dont think its right for them to get picked on.   It was portrayed as a sissy, and negative thing for the Jonas Brothers to declare their abstinence, probably because they are boys.  

In Jessica and Brittanys more innocent days, abstinence was seen as a positive thing for their images.  They were praised, and put themselves into the good girl categories.

Its not right that if males in the spot light make a decision like this, then they are patronized ruthlessly.  It goes along with the idea that its normal, ok, and encouraged for males to be very sexually active, and if their not they are sissy's.     

9/8

I think that how a child is raised has a huge impact on the childs personality and what they think is accecptable/normal as an adult. If a child is allowed to hit people and to throw things or if a child sees his parents doing those things, I think that he will grow up to have more violent tendencies. I am not saying that a child who is introduced to violence at a young age will be violent, I am saying that I think there will be a greater chance of the child thinking that it is ok or normal. I also believe that the gender characteristics that are pushed on childern at a young age will help determine the childs personal actions and beliefs as a teenager/adult. I think that boys should be allowed to cry and play with dolls, if that is what they want to do. The parents should not push anything on their child. Children should be treated differently from their siblings because they are different people, not because one is a boy and the other is a girl.

Men being stay at home dads

Men should have the choice whether they want to work or stay at home just as women do. I always grew up in a household where both my parents worked and that is the way I view my relationship, but my brother on the other hand is a stay at home day, sort of. He goes to school but doesn't work. His wife works and brings in all the money. But he is okay with this and so is the rest of our family we find nothing wrong with him staying home and taking care of the kids. But this a very touch subject when men are hanging around with other men and the pressure would ultimately get to them I think.

9/3/08

Today in class we discussed whether a guy would stay at home if the woman made enough money for him to do so. Every guy in the class said no unless they had some way of conrtibuting from home. I find that a little funny because what guy would not want to sit at home and mow the lawn, watch tv, hang out with his friends, and just wait for the woman to return home from work? My boyfriend has told me multiple times that if i mnade enough he would want to stay home and that he would not mind being a stay at home dad. I do not think that this would ever happen, but he admits that he would not mind and would actually like to do it. I do not understand why more men do not feel comfortable admitting that they would not mind.

A woman's place??

This was taken from the Houston Chronicle:

A woman's place

With the announcement that her 17-year-old daughter is pregnant, how can Sarah Palin possibly think she can continue her run for the Republican vice presidency? The GOP players have been quick to praise her family values, but I question the values of any woman who would leave a special needs infant and her pregnant teenage daughter to gallivant around the nation in a frantic, round-the-clock campaign for vice president.

-BETSY DOLAN
Sugar Land

I find this interesting...

I believe that if Sarah Palin was a man running for VP in the same situation, there would not be as much scrutiny on the issue.

I think that Sarah Palin should be praised for showing America that just because she is running for VP, doesn't mean she has a perfect family! Things happen...at least the Palin family is backing their daughter.